One year on

I realized as I touched down in Orlando last night and the pilot welcomed the locals (sort of me) home, I was doing the exact same thing almost exactly one year ago (December 19) when I returned home for good from England. That flight was a lot different. I am sure most neighboring passengers thought something was very wrong with me as I was crying on and off from the time I boarded in Brum to the time I touched down in Orlando. . . and then some. It was a really hard decision to come back to the United States. Although I still question it to this day, mostly because I loved my life and my friends there (and the easy access to travel elsewhere. . . .oh yeah and the Real Ales. . . ), I am very happy to be home. I am happy to be able to say this is home for me again, because I didn't feel like I had a home anywhere when I left for England in January 2005.




As the quote headlining my Strange Land Blog somewhat reflects, it sometimes takes stepping away, whether that be physically or metaphorically, to realize where your heart is at and what you want out of life. I have managed to settle in nicely back in Indy, better than I ever thought I would. I have some people to thank for that- some that have been friends for years, others that have been friends in the past but our relationship has seemed to evolved to something much stronger to the point I consider them family, and a couple others that have just come into my life this year but I consider a critical component to my life. These connections are especially important to me as I now have no family per se in the Midwest, but have great people I feel I can rely on for support when it is needed. I was lucky to have connections through some of those friendships that have led to a job I love perhaps more than any job I've had in the past and have settled into a home with it's quirks but character. As well as Nia, who also has her quirks but character ;-) and is a soothing comfort on lonely nights in a big house.




There are still a lot of things to be accomplished, some I won't be able to do on my own, but I feel good about this chapter and heading into the New Year very broke (new house, car, dog and all that) but happy and incredibly fortunate and grateful for the amazing experiences I have had so far in my life, the people that have influenced me, and the people that continue to do so.




Happy Christmas Everyone!

Getting Settled . . .

I've been home for about 10 months now from England. In that time I've already been to Florida four times, Chicago a few times, Memphis twice and had three of my closest friends from England visit me. I've got a new job, new car (newest I've ever had), bought a house and adopted a dog. Does this mean I'm growing up? I'm still not all that good at balancing a checkbook and still stay up to late on school nights (i.e., right now). My parents moved to Florida last month so now I am residing back in Indy but with no family. Well, that is not completely true. I have an "urban family" here, as I like to call them, that I don't know what I would do without. Besides, I've done the living somewhere with knowing no one for up to about three months so I suppose I can handle the fact that I'll just have to visit Florida even more now.






With all the wonderful travels and experiences I have had throughout my life, I've got to consider myself pretty damn lucky. I'm often reminded of that with the families that I work with. Sitting on a front porch with a mom and son this afternoon as they tell me about the guys racing by in their truck and how they'll be shooting guns in the neighborhood after dark. I've got absolutely nothing to be complaining about! I'm feeling happy here- most days. I think the days I don't are just part of the normal evolution in the pursuit of happiness we all go through. . . seeking out whatever goals we may still want for ourselves but always seeming slightly out of reach.






I do miss my UK home and all you folks there. I was hearing a lot that everyone has been asking about this blog and what I have been up to. So here you go. . . . there's multiple pages worth of photos spanning from mid-January up to this past weekend. It's not as ridden with witty dialogue as in the past but I'll work on that. Now that I have spent an exorbitant amount of time getting up-to-date tonight I hope to keep it updated regularly again for ya'll. This evening was kind of nostalgic of sitting at my computer at Gospel End in Sedgley while Bri stood in the kitchen and ate cake out of the pan with a fork. :-) I'm also writing again some essay/short story stuff but more in my head and not so much on paper. I may start putting some of that up if I'm feeling up to it.




Much love to you all! xoxo lis, your favorite American West Midlander-Midwesterner.

TaRa

I had written some eloquent words in my head in the last weeks here in England upon reflection of my time here. Now, with just a couple hours before I need to get my bags to Vicki's and meet a few friends for a last meal before I head off early tomorrow, I'm at a loss for words. I'm still questioning frequently why I am even leaving England, but then realize again why with the excitement of seeing my family and my Midwestern Urban family over the next few weeks. It's still surreal it's over and just two short years ago (give or take) I was getting on the wrong busses and struggling to understand the Black Country accent. Wait! I still do that!




Professionally I think I have grown a great deal and have had some challenging cases that I may not otherwise had the opportunity to work with in the States, because there is no way I would work for direct child protection services there. I found I was able to use a lot of my skills toward strengthsbased and solution focused practice, while still balancing an improved skill to be direct with people and challenge their actions when kids were at risk. I had two of the best managers I think that probably work in the area and therefore was lucky to be on one of the best teams in general. In addition, I was lucky enough to meet some people through work that became my closest friends in this country.




Personally I think I have grown a lot, as cliche as that sounds, and although there are a few personal experiences and relationships I wished would have played out differently, I am leaving a happier and more confident person than I was when I arrived. I have had the chance to see and do loads, although there was never enough time to do it all.




I'll miss everyone that I have met through my work, travels, and personal experiences. I'll remember even the strangers who only crossed my path for a few hours or days with fond memories. I'll miss waiting for my second bus these last weeks and staring up at at a castle (albeit a bit of a shabby one). I'll miss little chat breaks with the gals at work. I'll miss greasy egg sandwiches. I'll miss the guys at CAIU and how they always made me feel relaxed in awkward cases. I'll miss cheesey Brit pop and dance music. I'll miss Sarah Hughes Darke Ruby. I'll miss Bathams. I'll miss The Robin Hood when it was still Max's pub. I'll miss Cottage Street and the little water bowl in the corner. I'll miss being driven around in Minis. I'll miss being able to take weekend trips to Nottingham, Liverpool, London, and elsewhere. I'll miss pub quizzes. I'll miss our little house and Brooksie. I'll miss pints of guinness with Tom & Tom. I'll miss dinners at Rachael's house. I'll miss wine nights at Jackie and Martyn's. I'll miss parties with Lesley and her posse. I'll miss the Big Chill. I'll miss Bri's laugh. I miss Rusty. I'll miss dancing more than I think I ever did before (I suppose I'll have to continue that now). I'll miss really good currys. I'll miss the local chippy. I'll miss gray winters. I'll miss the Welsh seaside. I'll miss Camden. I'll miss old English gentlemen that chat away to me at the bus stop. I'll miss hearing people call each other Bab, or talk about the baby (pronounced bAby), or saying Tara a bit. I could go on forever, there is so much more I will miss.




But don't worry! I hope to be back to visit soon!

Farewell you Cheeky Monkeys

Today was my last day at work. I had gotten any casework left done Thursday so I was able to just hang about all day. We had a big lunch from the Chippy with everyone in the office and the Care Management and my team gave me an amazing collection of gifts. How am I going to pack all this stuff??? The highlight by far was a scrapbook put together with various reminders of events, our local sandwich shop and experiences, along with lots of lovely comments and farewell remarks. They even found a "cheeky monkey" to attach to it. I read the first page, which was the minutes from the first team meeting I ever attended and had to close it and save the rest to read alone at home. After saying goodbye to many people at work and having a lovely but emotional day, a few of us headed out for my last night out in Wolverhampton. Now, Wolvo is not the coolest place to go out and Cheeky Monkey's is definitely not the coolest bar or club I've ever been to, but it became iconic for the fun times we had there, often showing up at the end of the night and dancing our socks off. We started at the Little Civic, my favorite pub in Wolvo and Max and Marine also came out to wish me farewell. We got to Cheeky's I think earlier than I had ever been there before but the crowd of smarmy young men soon filled in the crowd . We danced our way away from them everytime they came near. It was a fun night, although I did cry when they played Like a Prayer (which I had asked the DJ to play about five times) because that's Nikki and I's "song."



Santa, his elves and a few of his reindeer even made an appearance at Cheeky Monkey's for my last Friday night in England.

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Random bus observation

Tonight I had to work late at the police station with an investigation, so I missed Becky's ride to Dudley and had to get two busses home. In my fatigue, I was baffled to see a guy get on the bus wearing a flourescent work vest and carrying a guitar with a few missing strings- in no case. It was raining outside. Just another random bus moment. . .

Dudley Beer Fest

I met up with Louise and her boyfriend Chris for Beer Fest this year. There were a few others that were supposed to join and a few guys from the Police that I work with were supposed to meet me but everyone else seemed to drop out. I did meet up with Mike and his friends briefly. Oh well, more beer for me and Chris! Louise was on the cider- slowly but surely. I sampled many fine ales yet again this year and a good time was had by all.

Thanksgiving

This year we tried to do Thanksgiving a bit more simply. We made the traditional dishes without going overboard and had a fair amount of people but managed to squeeze everyone into the lounge to eat together, as Thanksgiving should be. It was a very nice night and I made sure I enjoyed the food, the white wine and the company, so I did not take many pics.

Top Four Bands to Listen to While Enduring Public Transport

Obviously with Rusty deceased and departed I am left with the joys of the West Midlands Public Transport system; and bumming rides every chance I get. My friends at work that live near me have been incredibly generous going out of their way to pick me up in the morning or get me at least to Dudley after work so I only have to get one bus home instead of two. Namely Becky and Jackie, so I thank you both!




I am quite fond of the train system in England, to be honest, and would happily be a train commuter all the time but in my need to get from Sedgley to Dudley each day it’s bus or nothing. There is an interesting culture on the bus. If I manage to catch the same bus each morning, there are the same people each day. Some arrive on the bus with smiles that know each other and have their morning chat. Then there are the kids on their way to school, playing their music too loud forcing me to put my head phones on to drone out the crap dance music. Although I'm my usual friendly self who smiles at random old people and children and more than happy to strike a conversation if one presents itself, I’m more often on the bus one of those that find a corner seat, that’s hopefully not too dirty or smelly (although that can be hard to avoid) and hide out with my book and/or music. That is the one strength of public transportation (Of course, besides the whole helping the environment stuff)- being able to read loads and listen to the music I want to listen to, and not being stuck with what’s on the radio like I was with Rusty.




So this leads me to my top four bands (this week) to listen to on the bus:


1. Aereogramme


2. Peeping Tom


3. Broken Social Scene


4. Devotchka




Although, I would like to relay a caveat about Devotchka. This morning they almost made me cry in public on the bus with ‘How it Ends.’ But as I came home tonight, they provided some retribution with the drum beats of ‘The Oblivion’ in synchronization with the beats of my heart, followed by the energy of Eastern European rhythms in ‘Death By Blonde,’ parading into the romantic swooning of Queen of the Surface Street, leaving me to think some boy might feel like that about me one of these days and leading me right into Sedgley High Street. Thank you Bus Driver for getting me home safe! Now where’s that Friday bottle of Pinot? The week is gone; it’s time to crack it open!

Good news as I prepare to come home!

Those that speak to me often know I've struggled the last three months or so about what the heck I am doing with myself and whether I want to stay in the UK or return home. I am so happy here and in some ways happier than I have been anywhere else, but the bouts of homesickness always make me realize that as strong as my need to branch out is, my need to be close to the most significant people in my life is stronger. It only is resounded by times when I want to speak to my mamasita but can't because it's 3am there.

It's definitely official, there's no changing my mind now and I am coming home. I'm ready to get back and find somewhere I can build some roots for myself, wherever that may be. As excited as I am to come back and see everyone, I am left struggling with the emotions of leaving England and the people I have come to love so much here (and sometimes even the job, believe it or not). It's made me a bit moody of late but now I am to the stage of being intent on ensuring nothing but pure enjoyment for the next six weeks until I go.

And now, I have enjoyed the good news today of changes in our government that may mean positive changes overall for the state of the country. Nancy Pelosi becoming the first woman ever to serve as the speaker of the House of Representatives; Bernie Sanders becoming the first socialist in the US Senate for Vermont; Deval Patrick becoming the second black governor (of Massachusetts) in US History; and Keith Ellison becoming the first Muslim elected to the House of Representatives (for Minnesota). The icing on the cake is of course the resignation of Donald Rumsfeld (although I don't know much about this new fella). Now, just two more years of Bush and hopefully U.S. citizens will choose wisely and get someone with a hell of a lot more integrity and honest values in place of the idiot they've allowed to run our country for way too long.

Bonfire Night

Another Bonfire Night at Himley. I just took a couple pictures and they are not quite as good as last November's. The fire was actually lit by a couple of unruly teens earlier in the week and they had to rebuild it at the last minute. It was still huge though and the fireworks were much better this year. Some of us also managed to get in a couple rides at the fair and make ourselves dizzy.





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