Semantics

I had a conversation with the MOD during our lunch celebration yesterday about religion, and how it is a societal control that is unlikely to change much or go away any time soon. I expressed my anger about the word marriage. He confirmed, being from a background that he is more knowledgeable on these topics, that marriage is considered a sacrament of the catholic church. He agreed with my point of questioning, if it is all about the semantics and the history behind that word, does that mean we can't get "married?"

So, I am thinking of proposing to my friend who is doing our wedding invitations that we change the wording to something like this:

The QOE's parents
Invite you to participate in the celebration
of the legal recognition of the commitment
between their daughter
The QOE
and
The MOD

Does this sound too dry and too much like a business merger? I want it to reflect the joy of the day, but if the word marriage keeps others from being legally united, I want no part of that word. Besides, we are already committed to each other- I've already got a ring on my finger and I'm getting a temporary one for the MOD today. This is just the celebration of that already standing commitment and making it legal so the MOD can get health benefits. Well, and other lovely reasons, too.

Now on to the next task(s)

I took my ASWB clinical licensure exam this morning. I passed. Whew (huge sigh of relief and big grin).

As soon as I saw the screen pop up- You Passed - and experienced my initial elation and sharing of the good news with the MOD, parents and my bro, it started to feel . . . I don't know. . . . surreal? Anticlimactic? None of these are the right words. I can't describe it. A loss? A grieving process at the now absence of anxiety and pressure to spend all my free time studying?

Don't get me wrong, I am stoked. I do have a list hanging up at my desk with all/some of the things I want to start doing once I had passed the exam (and I passed it on the first try, biznatches [sorry- had to be done]). First off, I am already signed up with Keep Indianapolis Beautiful to help out with some planting of trees, community beautification and such and have a meeting with the group next week. I also have my eye on a second job at a doggie day care. Wouldn't that be a fun way to help save money for the wedding and pay off credit card bills?

Another bundle of joy enters the world

Just a little congratulations to my very dear friend who had her second child today. Her and her hubby now have the lovely balance of a little gal and new baby boy. She is one of the most lovely, fun people I know. A recent quote in one of our last phone conversations (to her daughter), "Hands are hugging, not for hitting." How can you not love a gal like that? Congrats to the whole family!

Now we'll definitely need a crafty/kid table at the wedding. We need some fun stuff for all these kiddos (and all the crafty adults).

Aw, I miss facebook and all it's useless antics

I need to use my coping skills and punch a pillow (like I would tell my kids to)

You are F***ing idiot, that's what you are. Sorry, I just can't believe people like this actually become social workers. They are speaking against our values, our Code of Ethics. The MOD is Atheist and I am pretty damn close. Does that mean we cannot marry because the "word" marriage is "originally defined in religious belief systems?" Is that even true? Grrrrr! You are a f***ing homophobe, bitch. Sorry. . . It just makes me so angry I want to scream. Do these idiots not see they are just as bad as those who protested racial civil rights mid twentieth century? And don't even get me started on the idiotic comparison to beastiality.

Taken from Help Starts Here Social Worker Blog:

"I’m a Christian, a Republican and a Social Worker. I also have a number of friends who happen to be in lesbian or gay relationships. I love them all. We’ve had discussions about same-sex marriage and the rights deserved by all people. If civil unions can lead to next-of-kin status for life partners–great! However, “marriage” is a term originally defined in religious belief systems and, while this language is included in modern day law, should not apply to any other than 1 man-1 woman relationships.

Additionally, changing the definition of “marriage” to go beyond 1 man-1 woman, will open doors to legalize polygamy and beastiality–both proven to emotionally, spiritually and sexually harm vulnerable persons (and animals).

In short, opposition to same-sex marriage does not make me a homophobe, but an advocate for a variety of lifestyles and vulnerable persons."

Before I hit the books

I had promised myself to avoid blog and other procrastinatory activities until after the test tomorrow, but I would just like to quickly make note and ask that we all remain aware today as the California Supreme Court hears arguments regarding Prop 8 .

I am not going to go into a huge diatribe. I just want to point out that marriage, civil unions, whatever you want to call them (it's all semantics), is about civil rights. Not privilege. This is not about any one's religion. This is about rights. This is about human beings being able to live their lives, loving each other happily and legally binding that love, as any human being has the right to do. See previous post on happiness.

The secret to happiness is . . .

Like we didn't already know what makes people happy. I am a little surprised this article reveals what the happiest people do to keep themselves that way like it is a new revelation. I suppose it's the ongoing movement in strengths-based practice to now research the good stuff instead of all the depressing and crazy stuff.

Work hard, play hard. Surround yourself with the people that love and respect you. Love yourself and don't give a hoot how others judge you (that one's always easier said than done, eh?). Laugh a lot. Be silly sometimes.

It is okay for us to be a little goofy at times and not intellectualize everything in the world around us. That shit's just stressful.

Wish me luck!

I am taking my LCSW exam Friday. I've studied a lot and studied hard, but at times I am not sure it was hard enough. My kiddos at school have been in one crisis mode after another, making it difficult to motivate myself once I get home to study about the meaning behind their temper tantrums. I've got a great partner though who, come to find out, is also an awesome cheerleader. As well as very supportive friends and colleagues. Hopefully by Friday afternoon the MOD and I will be celebrating and I won't feel so guilty about my blogging time (reading and writing). I am ready to have the LCSW piece of paper to validate what I already know and do . . .

Highlight of the weekend

Being convinced by the MOD to go to Fresh Market for cake in my polar bear fleece pajama pants and knitted slipper socks after studying DSM diagnoses all weekend. Of course, he had to tease me that I was initially somewhat hiding behind him in embarrassment of the polar bears.

A little note about acronyms

I have been making some attempts to make this slightly more anonymous. I am not too worried about it, because it is mostly viewed by people that already know me. Plus, as the MOD pointed out this morning, currently it is pretty easily located via a couple clicks of a Google search. But in order to move toward anonymity, I will be using acronyms to refer to myself and the male of the house (because he is the only male in the house).

So, just for a little clarification, my partner, my fella, the dude I'm marrying, or other terms I may use will be frequently referred to as the MOD. This acronym stands for Master of the Domain, but don't let it fool you into thinking I allow him to dominate the household or we have fallen into heavy gendered roles (although we kind of do, just naturally, and I am ok with that). We are very egalitarian household, which is why I am known as the QOE- Queen of Everything. To know us, is to know the satire behind these nicknames.

You may also see references to NIA, which would be Nia our dog. This is her actually name and we are working on refining a proper acronym to meet these letters. Any suggestions? Right now we have Nearly Intelligent Animal, but I think she deserves something a little more strengths based. Also, Nermal, our cat is sometimes referred to as the POW, Pile of Worthlessness. Not because we are not fond of her, but because she continues to do her own thing since we brought her home three weeks ago and we selfishly would like more attention and cuddliness from her.

There you have it. . . in case you were wondering.